When It Hurts Even Though It Shouldn’t

I’ve got my square squad. The people who know me—really know me. They see my heart, they see my effort, they see the messy, raw, real me, and they hold space for it all. Their voices are the ones I trust, the ones I go to when the world gets loud.

And yet, this week… someone outside that circle said something cruel. Something untrue. And it got to me.

I found myself spiralling—defending, justifying, doubting. Then I caught myself trying to apply logic: “She’s not in your square squad. Her opinion doesn’t matter. Don’t let it in.”

But here’s the hard truth: It still hurt.

Because no matter how strong our boundaries are, or how clear we are on who matters and who doesn’t, we’re human. And words—especially unkind, false ones—can sting, even when we know the source is irrelevant.

This is where the work lives. Not in pretending we’re untouchable. But in acknowledging the sting, sitting with it, and choosing not to let it define us.

I reminded myself of three things today:

  1. Just because it’s said doesn’t mean it’s true.
  2. Not everyone’s opinion is a mirror of who I am.
  3. Feeling hurt doesn’t make me weak. It makes me human.

So I’m letting myself feel it—but I’m not letting it rewrite my truth.

Because my square squad? They see me. And more importantly… I’m learning to see me, too.


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