When December and Christmas don't bring Joy
December is supposed to be the soft landing at the end of the year. The deep breath. The reward. Everyone talks about slowing down like it is a gift you unwrap and instantly enjoy. For me, it is not like that. December is hard. Christmas is hard. The downtime is hard. And I have stopped pretending it is anything else. When the year is busy, I cope better. There is a rhythm. A reason to get up. Things to respond to. People who need answers. Even stress has a shape. You can push against it. You can survive it one day at a time. Then December arrives and everything loosens. Schedules disappear. Noise drops away. People go quiet. And suddenly there is space. Too much space. Downtime sounds peaceful if your inner world is calm. If it is not, downtime feels like being locked in a room with your own thoughts and no distraction allowed. That is when things creep in. Grief that stayed polite all year suddenly clears its throat. Loneliness that behaved itself now wants a seat at the tabl...